I am a writer by nature and I have many things I’d still like to share, say, and explore about my third pregnancy which ended in miscarriage at 14 weeks. I keep hesitating to let the words come though, because this doesn’t feel like the right place to do it. Writing is healing for me–it helps me process, to learn, and to work through my emotions and thoughts. I HAVE to do it. I’m compelled. But, I’m not going to do it here. I started a new blog here instead. I will continue to write about birth and childbirth education via this blog and I’m not keeping the two—experiences or blogs—“secret” from each other. There will be overlap and shared links, I’m sure. I’ve just realized that if I’m going to be able to share openly in the way that I wish to, I must separate those posts from business website/blog. And, I need for only those who are interested to read it—rather than being “forced” to here or feeling like I’m “dwelling” too much.

I need to separate it too so that I don’t feel as if I’m continuing to ask my friends, my Facebook fans, blog readers, and clients to show sympathy for me or try to bolster my self-esteem by telling me how “great” I am (;-D) or being sort of forced to continue to reassure me. I have really appreciated the supportive comments on Facebook, but I almost feel like my pass on telling this story is expiring to the average person and I’d rather that they only read what I continue to need to say about this of their own free will, rather than having it piped into their Facebook feed. Why not just write in my journal then? (Indeed, I did write 19 pages in my journal about this birth/miscarriage.) Because, most of the time when I write, I write to share—“gathering and sharing information” is part of my life purpose and writing and sharing about this miscarriage experience is no different than my desire to share other birth information and experiences. So, follow me as you will…