I’ve already shared my 12 Days of Birth Activist Christmas, but I also have a lesser-known masterpiece to treat you with today. Once upon a time, many years ago Mark and I collaborated with my parents to come up with a lovely rendition of The 12 Days of X-Files Christmas. (We both used to be huge X-Philes, to the extent that in my pre-kid life I lovingly handcrafted a diorama of Mulder’s apartment, complete with tiny made-from-craft-foam porn videos, for which I printed small, smutty covers via the internet. Oh, and a fish tank.)

Sing it…

12 Days of X-Files Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Some parts from a dead body (or: a government conspiracy)

On the second day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Two UFOs and some parts from a dead body

On the third day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Three Lone Gunmen, two UFOs…

On the fourth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Four abductees, three Lone Gunmen…

On the fifth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Five cell-phone rings, four abductees…

On the sixth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Six Chaco chickens, five cell-phone rings…

On the seventh day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Seven swarms of bees, six Chaco chickens…

On the eighth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Eight Syndicate members, seven swarms of bees…

On the ninth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Nine black oil victims, eight syndicate members…

On the tenth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Ten little green men, nine black oil victims…

On the eleventh day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Eleven gross autopsies, ten little green men…

On the twelfth day of Christmas, Mulder gave Scully
Twelve reprimands from Skinner (or: twelve nice big kisses)…

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Totally off-topic? Yes. And that’s okay. 😉