Archives

Tuesday Tidbits: Teeth and Teaching

“Do not try to satisfy your vanity by teaching a great many things. Awaken people’s curiosity. It is enough to open minds; do not overload them. Put there just a spark. If there is some good inflammable stuff, it will catch fire.”
Anatole France (in The Earth Speaks)

A woman who writes has power, and a woman with power is feared.” —Gloria Anzaldúa, “Speaking in Tongues” (via The Girl God via Guerrilla Feminism)

Bits of the birth net:

It is old news, but this week a 2009 post from The Unnecesarean caught my eye: An OB’s Birth Plan: Obstetrician’s Disclosure Sent One Mom Running. The article describes the “doctor’s birth plan” a mother received from her medical care provider, which includes gems like this one:

“…I do not accept birth plans. Many birth plans conflict with approved modern obstetrical techniques and guidelines. I follow the guidelines of the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology which is the organization responsible for setting the standard of care in the United States. Certain organizations, under the guise of “Natural Birth” promote practices that are outdated and unsafe. You should notify me immediately, if you are enrolled in courses that encourage a specific birth plan. Conflicts should be resolved long before we approach your due date. Please note that I do not accept the Bradley Birth Plan. You may ask my office staff for our list of recommended childbirth classes…”

One of many reasons to run far away from this doctor! One of my Facebook friends made a great point though: “at least he’s honest! I think there are other doctors with similar views who might not make it clear until it’s ‘too late.'” This is true–he said it, but you know a LOT of people are thinking it/acting on it. So, that IS good that he was up front. Another mother then commented to add her own similar experience: “We went to an OB who had us sign something saying we would not have a birth plan or hire a doula. It felt so creepy to sign away all involvement in my own child’s birth – and doing so at 9 weeks felt like I was signing that I’d keep my mouth shut throughout the pregnancy, too. But gratefully, as you’re saying, it was clear early on that way this was not the OB for us. I’m sure many don’t get to find out before labor.”

Speaking of teaching and igniting sparks, it isn’t too late to register for our next Birth Skills Workshop—rapidly approaching on February 2nd! This workshop is specifically designed not to be a lecture, but is a hands-on, skills-building workshop.

Also via ScoopIt, I shared this article: Bearing the Burden of Choice: A Young Feminist’s Perspective

“Based on personal observation, choices concerning women’s reproductive health are heavily concentrated in preventative action – what are the best practices to avoid pregnancy? Consequently, prevention inspired language lends to a negative association with child bearing. It is something to prevent rather than embrace…”

She goes on to address something that I find to be a reason why sometimes birth activists have trouble connecting to the larger feminist community:

Abortion is one of those issues that seems to leak into every “women’s issue” whether initially intended or not. Needless to say, we talked about abortion to the point of exhaustion. Not to take away from the weight of abortion to the feminist cause, I began to recognize a gap in our reproductive justice discussions. I found myself asking the question:What about the women who choose the path of childbearing?

Those women are basically why I’m here and why I do what I do. And, what has been on my mind recently is explored in my most recent post: What to tell a mother-to-be about the realities of mothering…

“Why didn’t anyone tell me?” and, “why isn’t anyone talking about this?” is a common refrain echoing in the postpartum tales of many mothers. So, why don’t we tell them? Or, what can we actually tell them? Is there a way to really do so? I kind of think there’s not

And, connecting the teaching and the sparks and the women’s issues and the women writing having power, I also made sure to sign this petition: Vigorously support women’s rights by fully engaging in efforts to ratify the 1972 Equal Rights Amendment. This is going to be one of the discussions towards the end of my current Social Policy class (I can’t really write much about it here, but suffice to say the class is extraordinarily challenging so far and we’re only to week three). I hope no one vigorously disagrees with it or I might FREAK OUT! When I shared it on Facebook, a friend commented: “I am enraged that women’s rights are an ‘issue.‘” To which I replied: “Isn’t that the truth?! I hate that. It boggles my mind that women’s rights are considered a political issue that anyone could have a ‘position’ on. The nerve!!! ARGH. FREAK OUT, I TELL YOU”

And now, the teeth…

This post is essentially all about what I shared on Facebook apparently (might as well get some mileage out of it!). This is what I wrote yesterday:

In case anyone cares, I’m totally sick of taking my kids to the dentist! All three had appointments in Sullivan today (1.25 hour drive one way). Alaina wasn’t cooperative and is clearly traumatized from prior dental experience and we will need to go back to a pediatric dentist for her (crowns on two molars). Zander’s were good and he got two seals. Lann had two extractions (previously filled teeth) and one filling. I’m exhausted!

I still haven’t written my planned blog post about the heartbreak of tooth decay. I came home yesterday all fired up to write it, but then I had to get caught up on grading instead. But, I did take these pictures of my little pearls-wearing, skirt-sporting, curly-haired, brave little girl:

20130128-175534.jpg

20130128-175545.jpg

I told her I wanted to take a picture of her face and she ran away from me like this!

20130128-175613.jpg

Two other Facebook kid updates from this week that were funny:

Alaina put a bracelet on pushed high on her arm. When she took it off, it left a red mark. She looked at the mark solemnly and said, “scar.” Poor little sugar. She said it very acceptingly. Like, yep, I’m scarred now…

And

Yesterday, my little entrepreneurs cooked up a plan to raise some money to buy a pug. They decided they should raise Dobermans and sell them…”When people see the big cage of Dobermans in our yard, we’ll just tell them, don’t worry…it’s for pugs!” Hmm. I see a couple of flaws with this plan…

Hearing this, it suddenly became clear to me how puppy mills were invented—a couple of pre-ten-year-olds (or, adults with similar critical thinking skills) hung around talking about money-making schemes…

Tuesday Tidbits: Precious and Fragile

Via Birthing Beautiful Ideas, wisdom from BBI sponsor, The Mindful Way through Pregnancy from Shambhala Publications:

A better photo of our matching mother-daughter necklaces made by Mark :)

A better photo of our matching mother-daughter necklaces made by Mark 🙂

“Ultimately, what makes pregnancy a spiritual practice is not what kind of pregnancy we have. It’s who we open to it, moment by moment, breath by breath. Pregnancy is not about escaping or transcending physical existence. It’s about embracing it, in all its grit and mess and blood and uncertainty and pain. Pregnancy pulls us straight to the heart of what it means to be alive. It reminds us we are part of a universe that is infinitely creative and breathtakingly beautiful but where, ultimately, most of what really matters is out of our personal control. It teaches us that life is both precious and fragile–and that our hearts are both bigger and more vulnerable than we could have imagined.” –Anne Cushman

And, in considering life’s precious fragility, we need also consider the preciousness of midwifery:

“Bickering with each other will lead to our demise. We need to move away from a culture of blame and shift our focus to working collaboratively in order to identify a range of care options. This is a vastly different model than one group of midwives exclaiming, ‘VBACs are safe, all midwives should do them!’ or ‘VBACs are unsafe, no midwives should do them!’ (This is the same rigidity that accounts for high c-section rates in hospital settings.) Could it be possible that midwives who feel safe doing VBACs should be doing them and those who do not, should not? What if we each excelled at particular things and referred women to other midwives when we felt unable to provide care for them? We all need to take responsibility for the overall heath of our industry by honoring the journey that others have made to get where they are and the roles they play in service to mothers and babies.” –Jodilyn Owen (in Midwifery Today, Spring 2012, p. 28)

Shared via ScoopIt:

Some articles about birth:

Writer looks for healthiest, happiest approach to childbirth – California Watch

Study finds widespread ‘criminalisation of pregnancy’ in US institutions

Ky. Voices: Doctors often push for risky births | Op-Ed | Kentucky.com

And, some articles about parenting:

In not very enjoyable parenting articles, I found myself annoyed by this piece…

The Attached Family » What To Do When You Crave a “Mommy Time-Out”

The basic message is, you don’t need a timeout! Just hunker down, spend MORE time and love ’em harder! You are bad for ever wanting a break! Breaks need not ever occur to you. Bad, bad! Attach MORE, more, MORE! The sanctimonious and holistic-er-than-thou tone is exactly why I eventually discontinued my API membership. I am a very crunchy, AP-type parent, but I find that there are certain voices of the “movement” that make me want to run away screaming and saying, no wonder some people HATE US!

In enjoyable parenting articles I very much liked these companion pieces from Dreaming Aloud:

Dreaming aloud: The Sacred Role of a Parent

Dreaming aloud: Finding Our Centres – Tried and Tested Techniques for Family Sanity

And, I also found some things to identify with in this article:

Please Don’t Help My Kids

I’m more likely to be irritated by what I call Maternal Failure Alert alarm-raisers, in which someone “helpfully” points out something your child did or is doing or is asking or is needing or is located, when you already know it very well and in some cases are choosing to ignore/not respond/let them do it/or wait a minute.

Over the weekend I updated my Handouts page also.

Tuesday Tidbits: Pain, Power, and Lasting Memory

Inspired by the Wednesday Wisdom series of posts at Pagan Families and because I’m teaching on Tuesdays this session and thus not able to type substantive posts, I’m planning to start doing a new short weekly post with a few quotes and birthy news items that have caught my eye. I’ve thought several times that I should do themed posts or posts on specific days about specific areas, but somehow I don’t really work like that and instead spend hours on long missives that are perhaps never read through to the end. I don’t really have a posting schedule or weekly plan for posting, it just…happens. I notice from my archives that I seem to regularly post about 16 posts a month. Maybe I do have a largely unconscious schedule that I follow…

So, here’s my tidbits for this week:

“A ‘no’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better and greater than a ‘yes’ merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

I should perhaps pin this to my head. I feel as if I’m constantly being offered wonderful opportunities (what a problem, eh?!) and must ever be mindful of, “choosing the best and leaving the rest.”

See also: Balanced Living and Saying ‘No’ and The Ongoing Crisis of Abundance.

Switching gears into birth and pain:

“Women experience pain differently; some feel strong overwhelming pain, some may feel a deep discomfort during birth, and still others may feel no pain at all. The experience of pain during childbirth facilitates an unfolding of inner power and resources we never imagined we possessed, similar to enduring the pain of completing a marathon at the finish line.”
–Barbara Nicholson and Lysa Parker, API founders

(Prior musings on pain and birth.)

And into the power of place:

“If we believe that birth is a powerful, sacred event that has personal significance and meaning for the mother, baby and family, then we need to recognize that where it takes place is a sacred and holy site.” –Jenny Hall, “The Sacred Place of Birth” (via Pagan Families)

In other news, the first digital-only issue of the Friends of Missouri Midwives newsletter is finally available online! Yay! I’m so excited. The theme is Birth Art.

On Scoop.it, I shared links to a couple of interesting articles:

Childbirth classes if you AREN’T interested in natural birth

Sex After (a Traumatic) Childbirth – Onislam.net

And, finally, I fell in love with this awesome quote:

“Birth sticks with a woman, remaining in her bones and her flesh as an embodied memory long after the baby has left her womb.”

– Pamela E. Klassen, in Blessed Events (via Pagan Families)

And, I used some of my new art (more about this soon) to make a little graphic with it too…

398124_10152413274040442_130771351_n