Nineteen years ago today, after originally meeting through Boy Scouts in 1994, I went on my first date with the sweet, curly-haired boy I would later marry. We saw While You Were Sleeping in the theater, had lunch at Bruno’s restaurant, walked at Ber Juan Park and swung on the swings, played pool in his basement, and rented movies (and watched Speed). It was the first date either of us had ever been on and here we still are now! He brought me a rose on the twelfth of each month for a year and in late 1995, I gave him this picture and quote in a frame. It still sits by our bed and has been the motto for our relationship…
While I understand that people have many different experiences and while I can see the sentiments behind some of these remarks and thus I am not saying that no one should ever say these things nor am I implying your own relationship is “bad” if you do say them, there are three things you will never hear me say about our relationship:
- marriage is hard work
- marriage requires compromise
- everything changes once you get married
(*change any of these to be about parenting or about co-parenting and then I’ll agree with you though!)
Nineteen years and I can’t remember ever feeling like it was hard work to be his life partner.
Another thing you will not hear me say and that is because I literally don’t get why people say this and I actually feel sorry for them when they do say it is: love is a choice you make every day.
For me, no it isn’t. It is just there.
On Saturday, we had an LLL Mother’s Day picnic and photo fundraiser at the park. Here’s one of ours (still looking outward together):