DVD Review: Pilates Pregnancy

Mar21

PILATES PREGNANCY WORKOUTS ($14.99)
Distributed by BayView Entertainment (and available for purchase online at Amazon.com).
www.mauipilates.net

Reviewed by Molly, Talk Birth

While I’ve maintained a yoga practice for over ten years, practiced yoga throughout all of my pregnancies, and I’m Certified Prenatal Fitness Educator (ICEA), I have no experience with Pilates. So, when the opportunity came up to review a prenatal Pilates DVD, I was happy for the opportunity to broaden my horizons! Pilates Pregnancy Workouts is a basic workout DVD that is both easy to follow (even for those unfamiliar with Pilates) and sufficiently challenging. I was surprised by how effectively strengthening the workouts were, while appearing on the surface to be very gentle and simple! While this is a prenatal program, there is no mention of the applicability of the exercises to labor or birth and only a tiny handful of references to the baby.

In addition to the gorgeous ocean setting, a highlight of the Pilates Pregnancy Workouts DVD are the manageable, short segments—you can choose a workout that is 6-10 minutes. We can almost always find time in the day for six minutes! You can also choose to watch the entire exercise series as one continuous practice of about an hour. Also handy is the option of voiceover narration or nature sounds for once you’re familiar with the program.

Some exercises from Pilates Pregnancy Workouts are familiar from yoga practice, but the overall style and form is different and it would be great to include both in one’s prenatal exercise program! This DVD is a worthwhile addition to the prenatal exercise resources of pregnant women as well as doulas, midwives, or childbirth educators.

Non-Advice Books for Mothers

Mar14

Mothering can involve a complicated and multileveled emotional terrain. What often speaks most clearly and helpfully to mothers is other women’s stories and experiences, NOT “advice,” prescriptions, promises, or admonishments.

I’ve noticed two types of “attachment parenting” mothers—those who discovered AP after having their baby or child(ren) and those who chose attachment parenting in advance, sometimes way in advance. While of course a host of factors are involved, both internal and external, I’ve also noticed that those who discovered, feel more content and are less likely to be hard on themselves about their AP-“failures.” If you discover something, you have an ideal to live up to. If what you start with is the ideal, essentially the only way to go is down! I’m one of the latter bunch, having envisioned my attachment parenting perfection and bliss for at least three years prior to actually giving birth to my first baby. After my first son’s birth, I dove into more and more and more parenting books, trying to make sense of my new life. And, to me totally honest, Dr. Sears books started to drive me out of my frickin mind, even though I agreed with the guy about almost everything. I still recommend him, I met him in real life in 2007 and consider him an excellent resource, however the subtext I perceived in his books was: “do it the right way and you’ll always be happy and baby will never cry” and that was really, really hard on me as a vulnerable, sensitive new mother of a pretty cranky baby. So, I practically collapsed with relief when one of the birth center doctors suggested reading the book Misconceptions by Naomi Wolf. After this, I became obsessed with what is somewhat dismissively referred to as “the momoir”—memoirs of motherhood written by real women. Loved them. Lived by them. Learned from them. They “heard” me when I really, really needed to be heard.

Recently, a lovely friend and first-time mom on Facebook remarked that she needed to stop reading “advice” books about motherhood and try something else (though, still interested in reading about motherhood). Her comment reminded me so much of myself and I swooped in, ironically, with “advice” about other books to read. As I thought about books to suggests, the piles upon piles of books that I devoured came back to me in a rush. This morning, I went through my bookshelf and made a list of those that were influential enough to make the cut and be kept, versus being resold or passed along in the giveaway box. It is a big list! And, it is only a fraction of what I actually read. What was also really interesting for me to realize was that I haven’t read a book like this in ages, there are probably dozens more now! I still have several unread on shelf, but I no longer feel as if I need them in the same “lifeline” way in which I combed the library shelves with my first baby in his little sling.

So, here are my tips and suggestions on non-advice-based books for mothers. In general, I vote ixnay on any kind of “how to” mothering/parenting books. I vote yes on parenting memoirs, books about self-nurturing and mother-care, and sociopolitical commentary on motherhood. Disclaimer: a lot of the books on my list are written by “mainstream” authors, many of whom are pretty critical, sometimes very harshly, of attachment parenting. I find that some of these books create a lot of polarization with regard to Amazon reviews. At the risk of sounding very snobby myself, I would suggest that you are unlikely to enjoy these books if you are any of the following:

Unable or unwilling to engage intellectually with topics surrounding motherhood/parenthood.
Uninterested in the larger social, cultural, and political context surrounding individual mothers and their parenting “choices.”
Dismissive of the role that sociopolitical influences have on the lives and experiences of individual women.
Unable or unwilling to allow other women to define their own experiences and to recognize that not everyone experiences things the same way, and that that is fine, even desirable.
Fond of describing maternal honesty as “whining” and prefer “suck it up” approaches to sometimes painful explorations of complex feelings.

Before I list my books, make sure to check out Brain, Child magazine! I DO still read and devour this and feel as if it “saved me” multiple times during the first three years of parenting. And, make sure to check out my What Kind of Mother Are You Quiz, based on a memoir called Inconsolable.

These books may include links to prior posts/reviews about them. A lot of them are a blend of memoir and sociopolitical commentary—I classified them according to my perception of their primary emphasis. For all book reviews I’ve ever posted on my site, see this page.

Memoirs:

Let the Baby Drive by Lu Hanessian. This is one of my very favorites. Nourishing and enriching and relevant. May have a small tinge of “do it my way.”
Operating Instructions by Anne Lamott. This is a classic. A memoir of the author’s first year with her son. She is a single parent and so the book addresses some of the challenges involved with parenting solo. This book is incredibly funny at times.
Callie’s Tally by Betsy Howie. Very, very funny, though not particularly “AP” (so if you’re looking for that, read Let the Baby Drive instead). This book chronicles how much money the author has spent on her daughter during her first year of life.
A Better Woman by Susan Johnson this one is an often painful to read memoir of a woman’s experience with an obstetrical fistula
Fruitful by Anne Roiphe (also addressed in prior post: Motherhood, Feminism, and More). This is a good look at the tensions between feminism and motherhood and navigating new identities
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! A tale of mothering three sons.
The Blue Jay’s Dance by Louise Erdrich. Very lyrical, mild book. (Quoted or written about in these prior posts)
Dispatches from a Not-So Perfect Life–by a frequent contributor to Brain, Child magazine.
Inconsolable: How I Threw My Mental Health Out with the Diapers–memoir of a journey through severe postpartum depression. Darkly funny. Critical of attachment parenting, but in a manner in which I can identify.
Growing Seasons by Annie Spiegelman. This memoir is by a “sandwich generation” mother, caring for a toddler and for her own ailing mother.

Anthologies:

Mothers Who Think—collection of essays from writers for Salon.
The Bitch in the House–not all about parenting, about marriage, work, etc. Often angry.
Toddler–stories about parenting toddlers by one of the former editors of Brain, Child.
Beyond One—–collection of essays about adding a second child. I loved it. A friend I lent it to thought it was “horribly depressing.”
Real Moms—a surprising gem from MOPS. While I find many of their books too “surface” in emphasis and also very mainstream-Christian-mom directed, this one is great. One of my favorites.
The Fruits of Labor–about parenting at all stages of life. Some are tragic. This is more literary memoir than “tell all” memoir.

Sociopolitical commentary and analysis:

What Mothers Do (appears in Motherful) by Naomi Stadlen. I love this book! It takes a close look at how women mother and how skillfully they do so (so that on the outside it looks like they are doing “nothing”). This is not a “how to” book, but a book that tries to look below the surface and explore concepts that are very difficult to verbalize/articulate. She strives to put into words/give us language to describe what is it that mothers do all day–their often invisible contributions to life. Contributions that are often invisible even to ourselves. This is a very affirming and unique book. This is one of my top picks for tender new mothers. There may be some subtext about doing it “right” though.
Of Woman Born (included in this post: Motherhood, Feminism, and More). This is a classic sociological and personal exploration of the role, meaning, and cultural valuation (or devaluation) of mothers. This was my first exposure to the notion of motherhood as institution rather than simply as role/relationship.
Price of Motherhood by Ann Crittenden. Emphasis on economics, but very interesting analysis of multiple cultural, political, and social influences on mothers.
The Motherhood Manifesto—by Moms Rising. Showed me there is an actual “mother’s movement” afoot!
Paradox of Natural Mothering—academic in tone. I really enjoy this book. Lots of food for thought. It is a little uncomfortable to read too because she is so spot-on in her analysis of mothers like me. It is strange to feel “under the microscope.” The author herself is a “quasi-natural mother,” so the analysis isn’t harsh criticism, but it is a critical look at the “cult” (my word, not hers) of natural mothering and has a LOT of excellent discussion about feminism and natural mothering. She says–and I completely agree–that natural mothering represents the intersection of three ideological frameworks: voluntary simplicity, attachment parenting, and cultural feminism.
The Mask of Motherhood
Misconceptions by Naomi Wolf. As I mentioned, this was the first book that I ever read about a woman’s postpartum experience. It was suggested to me by the doctor at the birth center when I expressed some teary frustrations about adjusting to my new life and wondering if I would ever get “back to normal.” This book is on the “angry” side–it is not a nurturing and tender read and she is critical of things I value (like LLL). I did not identify with the author’s birth experiences or feelings about birth (I felt tremendous during birth and powerful, empowered, triumphant, and confident) and her conclusions seems mis-drawn, i.e. her birth was terrible, ergo, birth itself is terrible and those who tell you otherwise are lying, but her postpartum feelings closely match my own (weak, wounded, invisible, etc.)
Perfect Madness by Judith Warner. Included in this post: I just want to grind my corn! Fairly harshly critical of attachment parenting. takes potshots at LLL.
The Mother Knot by Jane Lazarre (included in: OBs and Normal)
Big Purple Mommy—about creativity and motherhood and still nurturing one’s creative self.
The Mother Trip (included in this post: Small Stone Birth Activism)–this one is written by Ariel Gore, original founder of the awesome zine, Hip Mama.
The Mother Dance by Harriet Lerner. This one focuses on the psychology of women primarily.

Mother nurturing/validating:

25 Ways to Joy & Inner Peace for Mothers
The Tao of Motherhood
The Hidden Feelings of Motherhood
Mother Nurture by Rick & Jan Hanson. This book is phenomenal. Very comprehensive. It addresses mothers of children from birth to age 5, so even if you are several years past the early postpartum weeks, this book has much to offer to you! One of the focus areas is on “Depleted Mother Syndrome” and addresses coping with it via all areas (body, mind, social/relational).
Mothering the New Mother–classic postpartum doula book! Highly recommended.
This isn’t what I expected—postpartum depression recovery.
After the Baby’s Birth by Robin Lim. This book is very holistic in approach and is one of my very favorite postpartum reads. It offers such gems as, “you’re postpartum for the rest of your life” (which some people have said they feel like is depressing, but I find a tremendously empowering statement!) and “when the tears flow, so does the milk” (with regard to the third day postpartum). It does have a large section on Ayurvedic cooking, which, personally, I don’t connect with, so be aware that that section is in there and depending on your belief system, might make perfect sense to you, or might seem inapplicable like it feels to me.
Mothers Guide to Self-Renewal

Novels/Others:

I Don’t Know How She Does It—fiction about an employed mother and the juggling act with which she tried to balance work and family.
Motherhood Confidential–this one is pretty weird. I almost didn’t include it and I also don’t know whether it is fiction or not. It is billed as “chicken soup for the spleen” and as an “anti-advice” book. I like the recommendation to scrape off the “dogma-doo” of parenting. It is about two best friends, one who becomes an attachment parenting homeschooling mother and the other who is a “detachment parent” and how rocky their relationship becomes.
Three Shoes, One Sock, and No Hairbrush by Rebecca Abrams. Primarily about adding a second child.

Book Review: Fathers at Birth

Feb24

(Amazon affiliate link included)

Fathers at Birth

by Rose St. John
Ringing Bell Press, 2009
Softcover, 255 pages
www.fathersatbirth.com

Reviewed by Molly, Talk Birth

Research has indicated that men at birth take on one of three roles: that of “coach” (20%), “teammate” (20%), or “witness” (60%). I’ve observed both in person and in birth films that this seems accurate. Many men seem to be likely to fall into an “observer” (witness) type of role during birth, instead of a more hands-on one. This can be disappointing to women, or to the men themselves, who pictured a more active role in the birthing process. Particularly in filmed births, I note the father of the baby sitting by a woman’s bedside and holding her hand, or patting her back at most.

Enter the book Fathers at Birth by Rose St. John. This book greatly expands the role of the father at birth to that of “mountain” and “warrior.” The mountain is strong, stable, calm, still, and supportive. The warrior is alert, responsive, focused, and protective of the birth space and laboring woman. He is there to serve.

In the opening chapter of the book, the author says, “If families are to remain strong, men and their roles as partners, husbands, protectors, and fathers cannot be considered dispensable or superfluous. both partners are diminished when the value of a man’s contribution is marginalized, minimized, or not acknowledged. When the man’s vital role during labor and birth is understood, both men and women are empowered.”

I greatly enjoyed reading a book that explores and expands the role of men at birth. In addition to serving as a helpful resource for men who wish to be active partners in the birth process, doulas will find helpful tips and tricks in the book, and childbirth educators will find language and ideas for reaching out to and better connecting with the men in their classes. It is a nice addition to any birth professional’s lending library.

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Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of this book for review purposes.

Review originally published at Citizens for Midwifery.

Multimedia Review: Pregnancy Health Yoga

Feb18

Pregnancy Health Yoga: Your Essential Guide for Bump, Birth and Beyond (Amazon affiliate link included)

Multimedia Review: Pregnancy Health Yoga (book/DVD set)
by Tara Lee and Mary Atwood
ISBN: 978-1-84899-081-4
http://www.taraleeyoga.com/shoponline.php

Yoga has played an important role in all of my pregnancies and births. I began practicing yoga daily in 2001 and it was only natural to continue that practice throughout my first pregnancy. I was surprised in realize in hindsight that I’d also used yoga throughout my first labor—spending a lot of time in a modified version of child’s pose and on hands and knees, and also in a supported version of downward facing dog. Later, as a birth educator, I discovered those same poses could be combined in a series of “birthing room yoga” poses. I loved the knowledge that my body had spontaneously used these poses during my own birth experience—it was an affirmation for me that deep birthing wisdom resides in our bodies and will emerge if we have the freedom around us to let it emerge, no books, classes, and “preparation” really necessary, just space, breath, and freedom of movement.

So, naturally I was very excited to receive a copy of the new book and DVD set Pregnancy Health Yoga: Your Essential Guide for Bump, Birth and Beyond. The book is particularly lovely, containing clear, colorful, ample photographs, not only of step-by-step pose instructions, but also close-up photos of flowers. Another special touch is a set of affirmations introducing each section. The affirmations are appropriate for pregnancy, labor, birth, and many can be applied into the rest of life as well (i.e. “Breathing deeply, I let go of tension with each exhalation”). The book and the DVD both do and excellent job connecting yoga to the birth process, something that I do not always find present in prenatal yoga resources (many of which seem to be simply designed as modifications to traditional yoga and completely ignore the connection between prenatal yoga practice and birthing itself). There are ample mentions of the baby and how your yoga practice benefits the baby as well as many integrated connections between the movement of your body and breath in yoga and in the dance of birth.

The included DVD is a restorative, simple, gentle yoga series of about 20 minutes. It includes a closing meditation and the content is basic and easy to follow. It helps pull together the information from the book into actual practice. The lines are clean, the narrator is pleasing, and the pregnant model is comfortable to follow. Many prenatal yoga DVDs include a large amount of modifications based on trimester being demonstrated by multiple models during the practice session, which I find distracting. This DVD is different in that all the poses are appropriate for all trimesters and when a very few modifications or adjustments are offered, they are smoothly incorporated into the flow of the existing pose, rather than being demonstrated by someone else.

My only critique of both the book and DVD is that they feel a bit choppy—the book primarily presents poses alone, rather than as a series of exercises, meaning the reader has to then create their own series of poses to practice from scratch, rather than having a prepared series of poses to practice routinely (there is a step-by-step photo exploration of a sun salutation that is an exception). The DVD helps provide an example series of poses though the manner in which the DVD is filmed contributes to a similar feel (i.e. rather than see the model move from one pose into another, the camera fades out and then back in on her already in the next position, so the sense of continuity between poses is impacted).

Pregnancy Health Yoga: Your Essential Guide for Bump, Birth and Beyond is a beautiful, helpful companion for pregnant women as well as for those who work with them. As well as chapters about breathwork and visualization, creating space, strength and stamina, and relaxation, the book includes a useful section about working with common ailments and conditions (including backache, leg cramps, and symphysis pubis dysfunction), exercises specifically for labor and birth, and also section about getting back into shape postpartum.

“Yoga can create space where there was compression, can make open what was closed and can make soft our hard and abrasive edges. The process of pregnancy itself opens and expands our hearts and our capacity to love.” –Pregnancy Health Yoga

Related articles:

Incorporating Prenatal Yoga into Childbirth Education Classes

Moon Salutation Yoga Series for Blessingway or Women’s Gathering

Birthing Room Yoga Handout

Centering for Birth

Birthing Affirmations

How Do Women Really Learn About Birth?

Book Review: Mindful Motherhood

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Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of this product for review purposes.

2012 Book List

Jan4

Some of the books I got for Christmas, waiting to be delved into!

More delights just longing for attention!

I actually got started in blogging through my now-defunct book blog. And, I used to keep a running list in a notebook of books I read each year and then transcribe it at the end of the year. That was a pain. So, I eventually I realized I could use Goodreads as my booklist AND save myself a lot of work and energy by copying and pasting from that list, rather than typing it all up by hand. Go, me! I usually read between 100-150 books a year. This is mainly because I have had a nursling for nine years now and I read at naptime and bedtime every day. I also naturally read very fast and always have. My reading was down this year though because I got an ipad last January and while I do use the Kindle app on it to read books, I also am much more likely to start poking around on the internet instead. This is something I’d like to change in 2013! I’m noticing my personal pendulum swinging back more to print books rather than digital books and at any one moment I have at least three stacks of books-in-progress, dotted around the house.

At the beginning of December I noticed that my 2012 book list at Goodreads only had 95 books read on it! Yikes! So, I picked up the pace and read five more, bringing my yearly total up to a nice, even 100 by the end of the year 🙂

Here’s my list! If there is an associated review already published here, that is noted in the review column. What were your favorite reads of 2012?

title	review/notes	date
Women’s Medicine Ways: Cross Cultural Rites Of Passage		Dec 27, 2012
Mother Wit: A Guide to Healing & Psychic Development		Dec 26, 2012
Desert Priestess: A Memoir	Loved this book! Beautifully written in a very honest manner the narrative includes her self-doubts and follies as well as her priestessly moments. My heart is yearning to take a pilgrimage to the desert now, as well as to further deepen and refine my own priestess path.	Dec 26, 2012
Woman’s Magic: Rituals, Meditations, and Magical Ways to Enrich Your Life	Mediocre.	Dec 25, 2012
Voices of the Goddess: A Chorus of Sibyls	Very good!	Dec 25, 2012
Living Goddess Spirituality, a Feminine Divine Priestess Handbook	This is a wonderful book! Lots of good resources and thoughtful commentary. Some critiques in that some of the print is extremely tiny, some material is repeated from the previous book, there is quite a bit of repetitiveness, and not all suggestions are fully developed (I.e. for each goddess there are multiple “workshops” suggested which include things like making various items. However, no further information or instructions for most of these things are included).I don’t usually connect strongly with individual goddess imagery, but the way in which this book was written brought in the significance of many different goddess images and I found myself learning and thinking about specific goddesses in different ways. I also loved all the different chants, ritual outlines, and invocations included. Really great pictures and some beautiful art enhance the book.Great circle resource and good resource for Priestesses!	Dec 23, 2012
Mothers of Thyme: Customs and Rituals of Infertility and Miscarriage	This book wasn’t what I expected or hoped for. It is all obscure historical and cultural “rituals” like eat three raw eggs mixed with bat dung while standing under the banana tree on the new moon, types of things. Some things are really interesting to read about from a historical perspective, but there is nothing of relevance to creating ceremony/acknowledgement for mothers today. It is definitely a history/anthropology book more than a miscarriage resource.	Nov 20, 2012
Sacred Circles: A Guide To Creating Your Own Women’s Spirituality Group	I’ve read this twice. It was the first book I bought on women’s spirituality/women’s circles and despite much MORE reading and training since originally buying the book, including ordination as a priestess, i still discovered new insights on second reading. Contains great quotes from various other authors also and good bibliography. My only critique is that the section on example rituals could use a lot more detail.	Nov 11, 2012
Hard Eight (Stephanie Plum, #8)	Listened to audio book version.	Nov 08, 2012
Ten Big Ones (Stephanie Plum, #10)	Listened to audio version. Evanovich books are perfect for audio–light and fun enough to keep you entertained on a commute and you don’t have to “waste” serious reading time on them, just already-wasted in the car time! These books are like “dessert” for me after all the nonfiction and academic reading I do. So, they’re a fun treat and I love Lorelai King’s reading of them!	Nov 08, 2012
Eleven on Top (Stephanie Plum, #11)	Listened to audio book version.	Nov 08, 2012
Ecofeminist Philosophy: A Western Perspective on What It Is and Why It Matters	Read for Ecofeminism class.	Nov 08, 2012
Reweaving the World: The Emergence of Ecofeminism	Read for Ecofeminism class.	Nov 07, 2012
Feed (Newsflesh, #1)	Read for book club.	Nov 07, 2012
Zoe & Zak and the Ghost Leopard	Read this aloud to my boys, ages 9 and 6. The six year old’s attention wandered during it, as did my own, and it took a long time to finish–the book has lots of, IMO, unnecessary description and repetitiveness. It was an interesting story overall though with a variety of twists and lots of action. The nine year old voted five stars very enthusiastically though saying he “loved it!”, so I told him that’s what I’d put in!	Nov 07, 2012
Casting the Circle: A Women’s Book of Ritual	Loved it! Great resource. Includes words to a variety of chants as well as outlines for a number of rituals for a variety of purposes. Differentiates between Women’s Spirituality and Wicca in a way that some pagan books seem to miss/ignore, though assumes more overlap/congruence between the two than I, personally, have experienced or perceived.	Oct 14, 2012
The Thundering Years: Rituals and Sacred Wisdom for Teens	Excellent resource! Empowering, insightful, and creative.	Sep 20, 2012
Shamanism: Guide for Life (New Life Library	Short and basic.	Sep 16, 2012
Grandmother Moon		Sep 14, 2012
The Queen of My Self: Women Stepping Into Sovereignty in Midlife		Sep 09, 2012
Walking an Ancient Path: Rebirthing Goddess on Planet Earth		Sep 03, 2012
Ethics & Professional Practice for Clergy		Aug 29, 2012
Pushing for Midwives: Homebirth Mothers and the Reproductive Rights Movement	Book Review: Pushing for Midwives	Aug 27, 2012
The Goddess Celebrates: An Anthology Of Women’s Rituals	Very good resource!	Aug 27, 2012
The Power of Ritual	Basic, but interesting and well-written.	Aug 20, 2012
Living In The Lap of Goddess: The Feminist Spirituality Movement in America	Read for a class.	Aug 18, 2012
Rituals for Our Times: Celebrating, Healing, and Changing Our Lives and Our Relationships	There were some good things about this book about the meaning, value, purpose, and role of ritual in family life. I lost interest about halfway through and ended up skimming the second half. While it does contain some planning lists/worksheets for considering your own family rituals, the overall emphasis is on short vignettes of how other families have coped with challenges or occasions in their own lives. Also, the focus is on very conventional, mainstream “ritual” occasions–birthdays, anniversaries, holidays–rather than on life cycle rites of passage and other more spiritual transitions in one’s life.	Aug 18, 2012
Walking Your Walk: A Woman’s Guide to a Spirit Filled Life	Totally forgettable.	Aug 16, 2012
Awakening To The Spirit World: The Shamanic Path Of Direct Revelation	Great that it comes with a CD! Tedious towards the end and I found myself losing interest/skimming. Not as readily practical as some other shamanic books.	Aug 14, 2012
The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks	Read for book club. Extremely interesting book covering a subject I had very little to no prior knowledge of–written in a conversational style that is paced like a novel.	Aug 11, 2012
Ariadne’s Thread: A Workbook of Goddess Magic	Loved this book! Accidentally found it after accidentally finding Shekhinah’s cool Womanrunes system. Enjoying reading older books on Goddess spirituality lately. Lots of great stuff to be gleaned from less well-known works.	Jul 31, 2012
Sacred Ceremony: Create and Officiate Personalized Wedding Ceremonies	Excellent resource for officiants (couples too). Jumps right into the basics of wedding ceremonies (no long intro or background, immediately to the meat of the book). Clearly and concisely written. Contains “spiritual” (actually, Abrahamic religion oriented) and “non-spiritual” (humanist) examples for each segment of a wedding ceremony (I.e. opening words, declaration of intent, vows, rings, closing blessing…).	Jul 30, 2012
Joining Hands and Hearts: Interfaith, Intercultural Wedding Celebrations: A Practical Guide for Couples	Good resource with many ideas for couples and officiants. Skimmed second half which has examples of specific traditions/ceremonies.	Jul 30, 2012
Wedding Blessings: Prayers and Poems Celebrating Love, Marriage and Anniversaries	Short collection of primarily quotes/readings for use during weddings. Only one real example of vows/ceremony. Useful for browsing for love/marriage/anniversary quotes, not very useful for actually planning a wedding ceremony.	Jul 28, 2012
The Midwife of Hope River	Book Review: The Midwife of Hope River	Jul 27, 2012
The Heart of the Fire	Read for book club and have mixed feelings–could take it or leave for roughly first 200 pages and then got more enraptured and couldn’t put it down by the end. A bit erratic (and eccentric–is supposed to be the author’s past-life experiences) and sometimes extraordinarily romance-novel-esque what with all the heaving and bodice-ripping *Spoiler warning*For those who, like me, prefer to avoid horrible scenes of brutal rape and torture, I suggest skipping pages 466-490, at minimum.	Jul 10, 2012
Seven Up (Stephanie Plum, #7)	Listened to audio version. Hated the narrator of this one (different than the first six and the following books–obviously, I’m not the only hater). She also pronounces Eddie’s last name as “DeCooch,” which I found distracting.	Jul 07, 2012
New Age and Armageddon: The Goddess or the Gurus?: Towards a Feminist Vision of the Future	Very interesting look at the incompatibilities between “New Age” philosophies and thoughts and feminist spirituality and Goddess perspectives.	Jul 07, 2012
Laughter of Aphrodite	Subtitled, “reflections on a journey to the Goddess,” I was anticipating a more personal, chronological narrative. Instead, this is mainly a collection of essays/papers/presentations about various aspects of Goddess spirituality. Many of them are interesting, some are from other sources. I discovered a lot that was worthwhile in this book, but it wasn’t what I was anticipating reading and so I ended up feeling disappointed also.	Jun 29, 2012
Goddess Spirituality for the 21st Century: From Kabbalah to Quantum Physics		Jun 17, 2012
Goddess Matters: The Mystical, Practical, & Controversial	About half of the material seemed recycled from previous books?	Jun 17, 2012
The Gift of Giving Life: Rediscovering the Divine Nature of Pregnancy and Birth	Book Review: The Gift of Giving Life	Jun 15, 2012
Birth on the Labyrinth Path: Sacred Embodiment in the Childbearing Year	Review: Birth on the Labyrinth Path	Jun 12, 2012
Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement		Jun 11, 2012
Janet Evanovich: High Five, Hot Six (Stephanie Plum, #5-6)	Fun to listen to audio book versions on my commute!	Jun 07, 2012
Our Stories of Miscarriage: Healing with Words	Very good book. I wish I had read it when my miscarriages were in process rather than now, in retrospect. This is a collection of personal stories, essays, poems, and reflections about miscarriage and stillbirth (mostly miscarriage). Most of the stories are written by women and there are a handful written by fathers. The stories of other women reaching out across the page and across the years is a beautiful gift to all the women to follow who find themselves joining the same, unwanted “club.” I identified with the closing journal entry reflecting on, “all the women who comforted me with stories…a sorority of sorrow, these women, and now myself among them, moving past the pain to find a jagged peace in comforting another suffering sister.” (Edgren, p. 184)	Jun 04, 2012
Sacred Pregnancy: A Loving Guide and Journal for Expectant Moms	Book Review: Sacred Pregnancy	Jun 03, 2012
Goddess Meditations		Jun 03, 2012
Beloved	Read for book club. Kind of hated. Should have done two stars.	Jun 02, 2012
Relationship Status	Clever short story. Amusing and scary look at social media of the future–takes on a life of its own!	May 25, 2012
The Sidhe Princess	Didn’t realize it was a short story and was very caught off guard when it suddenly ended. Good character development in such a small size. Interesting story that kept me turning pages!	May 25, 2012
Semper	Really enjoyed this fast-paced YA dystopian novel. The main character is sometimes frustrating in his inaction/puzzlement, but overall it was a great read. Very quick with pacing–sometimes hard to keep up with everything that is going on. Keeps you on the edge of your seat and turning pages. Two great female characters and an interesting secondary character I didn’t expect to see continue as part of the action.	May 21, 2012
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Harry Potter, #6)	Enjoyed listening to the unabridged audio edition in the car with my boys.	May 19, 2012
Moon Time	Delightful resource for the empowered woman! I read this one twice this year. Book Review: Moon Time	May 19, 2012
This Mother’s Life	Book Review: This Mother’s Life	May 16, 2012
The Memory Palace	Read for book club	May 09, 2012
To Err is Common	Book Review: To Err is Common	May 06, 2012
Threads That Bind	Interesting, fast-paced, and with some twists. Unresolved ending setting you up for book two.	Apr 29, 2012
Asenath		Apr 29, 2012
Minimalism: Essential Essays		Apr 27, 2012
Night of the Purple Moon		Apr 27, 2012
Latitude 38	I found this book very engrossing, suspenseful, and well-written. It is not a feel-good tale though. Pretty gruesome, violent, and ultimately hopeless/depressing. Don’t wait for a happy ending! It reminded me of Hunger Games in overall tone and structure, but was more depressing.I agree with other reviewers who have noted that you don’t find out any more about what is happening politically than you read in the Amazon description (which gives you actually more info than the book itself about the domestic situation).As a Missouri native, I enjoyed the element that Missouri is the line between the two halves of the nation and it is familiar Missouri topography that must be navigated on the characters’ flight from the oppressive half of the divided US. The implication is that it split along political lines, with the conservatives holding one half and the secular/liberal side holding the other half. Since we never actually spend any time in the secular half, we never know if it is really doing as good as they hope it is, but the conservative half as it evolved in this tale is certainly not a state that I would ever want to live in!	Apr 25, 2012
Goddess Initiation: A Practical Celtic Program for Soul-Healing, Self-Fulfillment & Wild Wisdom	Did not like at all. Sounded cool. Was not.	Apr 18, 2012
Pagan Family: Handing the Old Ways Down	I don’t really consider myself to be pagan, but I have been looking for ideas for family-friendly rituals and seasonal celebrations. This book was a good resource with a variety of ideas, readings, and rituals as well as some instructions for craft projects.	Apr 15, 2012
Trickster’s Choice (Daughter of the Lioness, #1)	Listened to unabridged audio edition during my commute and loved it. Kept thinking about the story in between drives. I was a huge fan of Alanna as a kid (my own daughter is named Alaina, actually!) and Aly is also an enjoyable character. As I listened, I kept being curious about the spelling of names, thinking that, based on hearing them pronounced, they’d certainly be difficult to decode while reading–from other reviews, I think I was right! Semi-predictable, but with some twists and intrigue and interesting characters galore!Some familiar Tortallan characters make small appearances, but don’t expect to spend too much time with the Lioness or anyone else from Alanna’s books.**I think the item description is supposed to say “impressive heritage,” right?! George and Alanna might have been hard on Aly, but they weren’t “oppressive”!	Apr 09, 2012
Women’s Rites, Women’s Mysteries: Intuitive Ritual Creation	Great resource!	Apr 08, 2012
On the Right Path: Walking Through God to Get to	Interesting personal memoir of the author’s spiritual journey. Good insights into a model of Christianity that doesn’t work (for her) and to a solitary Wiccan path that does. Writing style is a little erratic/uneven and some of the anecdotes were a little “out there.” The author is clearly very committed to her spiritual development and watching her progress was interesting and engaging.	Mar 31, 2012
The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Other Tales of Terror	Read for book club.	Mar 30, 2012
Fire of the Goddess: Nine Paths to Ignite the Sacred Feminine	I really enjoyed this book overall. The first half was stronger than the second, but it picked up again by the end. Fire of the Goddess explores 9 goddess archetypes and includes visualization/meditation exercises for each, followed by an illustrative story, and then a combination of exercises/assignments/ritual. One of the best things about this book was that the ideas for activities were very creative and interesting and not just a rehash of other ideas. I enjoyed the visualizations, but did not find myself connecting with the goddess stories meant to illustrate the archetypes. The sections about the Dark Mother and the Priestess were especially good. High quality, original, useful, and informative, I think anyone interested in goddess spirituality would enjoy Fire of the Goddess and take away some practical ideas.	Mar 30, 2012
Sacred Groves	Read for a class.	Mar 30, 2012
Into These Hands: Wisdom from Midwives	A favorite this year! Book Review: Into These Hands	Mar 24, 2012
Earth Prayers: From Around the World: 365 Prayers, Poems, and Invocations for Honoring the Earth	Lovely collection of readings, poems, and prayers with a ecological emphasis. Some really spoke to my heart, others did not (mostly those that use traditional Judeo-Christian language), but it is such a large collection that there is something for everyone. I appreciate how many of the readings brought a sense of the sacred, a touch of the holy, to everyday, natural events and concepts. i.e. “thanks to the spirit of evolution…” Personally, I like the idea of “every day sacred” and I felt like this book put that feeling into words.I read this book over the course of a year, little-by-little, as I sat at my home altar each afternoon. A blog post I wrote inspired by one of the readings is here: https://talkbirth.me/2012/03/23/300-th…	Mar 24, 2012
More Than a Midwife	Book Review: More Than a Midwife	Mar 21, 2012
Gone (Gone, #1)	YA dystopian fiction.	Mar 15, 2012
Talking to Goddess	Nice collection of different readings, poems, prayers. Lots of voices are represented and some are more appealing than others–most will find something that speaks to them in this collection. Quality is somewhat erratic.	Mar 14, 2012
The Sex Club	Fiction, mystery.	Mar 13, 2012
Goddess Wheel Of The Year	Read for a class.	Mar 10, 2012
Way Back Home		Mar 04, 2012
Mockingjay (The Hunger Games, #3)		Mar 04, 2012
Catching Fire (The Hunger Games, #2)	Read the first one for book club in January.	Mar 02, 2012
Sisters Singing: Blessings, Prayers, Art, Songs, Poetry and Sacred Stories by Women	I read this book piece by piece over the course of the year during my morning meditation time. Some very beautiful and meaningful poetry and prose. Highly recommend!	Feb 24, 2012
Nobody Girl		Feb 24, 2012
I Am Woman by Rite: A Book of Women’s Rituals	Unimpressive.	Feb 19, 2012
Daughter of the Forest (Sevenwaters, #1)	Read this for book club and thoroughly enjoyed it. Little slow to get started, but I’m so glad I stuck with it. It was gripping! There was a very, very disturbing scene and I agree with other reviewers that I’m not sure why fantasy books always have the heroine suffer so grievously 😦	Feb 13, 2012
First World Problems: 101 Reasons Why The Terrorists Hate Us	Needed something lightweight and fun to read and greatly enjoyed this collection. A quick read that had me laughing hard enough that I experienced the first world problem of needing to wipe laughter-tears from my eyes on my pajama shirt.	Feb 10, 2012
Eve Hallows and the Book of Shrieks (Nightmare, #1)	I read this aloud to my 8 year old. His verdict: amazing, awesome, and all the stars. I enjoyed it also and we both laughed out loud on multiple occasions. Very funny and unusual tale about a human girl raised by monsters who is called upon to help the survival of both human and monsterkind. Ending was slightly weak, mostly because it was prepping for book two, rather than a story resolution.	Jan 31, 2012
Witchcraze: New History of the European Witch Hunts, a	An intense read that is not for the faint of heart. Important topic, but very difficult to read about. The violence against women was intense and profound. Deeply disturbing, but important to recognize, particularly the ongoing legacy in contemporary culture. Read for a class.	Jan 30, 2012
Dear Heart, Come Home: The Path of Midlife Spirituality		Jan 30, 2012
Meditation Secrets for Women: Discovering Your Passion, Pleasure, and Inner Peace	I spent a whole year gradually reading through this book. I highly recommend it to any woman who has felt like there was something “missing” in traditional approach to meditation and to a Zen living approach. Maurine clearly explains how traditional approaches are some antethical to woman’s natural ways of relating to the world and that traditions that encourage “transcending” the body, actually may mask hostility to the female body. This is a very earthy, grounded, practical, insightful book with a lot of great content.	Jan 18, 2012
Miss Minimalist: Inspiration to Downsize, Declutter, and Simplify	Much of the content was familiar and there was some repetition, but it lit my fire to get back to decluttering–closets, shelves, wardrobe, brain, and life commitments/schedule. I needed the reminder to choose the best and ditch the rest!I like the term “minimalist”–less cumbersome than “simple living advocate” and less confusing/potential bizarre than, “simple liver.” I immediately decluttered my stash of scarves, winter hats, and gloves. I like her idea to get rid of one thing every day. Could be a great 2012 challenge project! Friendly, clear writing style.	Jan 17, 2012
The Walk		Jan 15, 2012
Breathless (Jason and Azazel, #1)		Jan 15, 2012
Unknown Book 12391297	Still can’t remember what this one was–Goodreads deleted it from their library and since I was using Goodreads as my way to remember, of course, now I’ve forgotten!	Jan 14, 2012
Unfriend Yourself	Christian book about disconnecting from social media.	Jan 14, 2012
Her Wiccan, Wiccan Ways (Rhiannon Godfrey, #1)	Forgettable fiction.	Jan 13, 2012
Passionate Journey: My Unexpected Life	Book Review: Passionate Journey: My Unexpected Life	Jan 13, 2012
The Grimm Curse		Jan 13, 2012
Samael’s Fire (Apocalypto, #1)		Jan 13, 2012
Space Junque / Spiderwork (Apocalypto 1 & 2)		Jan 13, 2012
The Hunger Games

Book Review: Fathers-To-Be Handbook: A Road Map for the Transition to Fatherhood

Dec10

Fathers-To-Be Handbook: A Road Map for the Transition to Fatherhood
By Patrick Houser
Creative Life Systems, 2007
Softcover, 160 pages, $16.95.
ISBN: 978-0-615-23338-3
www.fatherstobe.org

Reviewed by Molly Remer
http://talkbirth.me

I am delighted to see another contribution to a growing body of birth and fatherhood literature written for men. Unlike many fathering books I’ve reviewed, the Fathers-To-Be Handbook was actually written by a man! This man-to-man, father-to-father perspective is a valuable strength of the book.

Patrick Houser is the father of two boys, both born at home with a midwife. His second son, born in 1980 in Missouri, was the first documented water birth in the U.S. The author has been based in the U.K. for a number of years now and is the co-founder of a wonderful organization called Fathers-To-Be, offering resources and education for expectant fathers as well as to the childbirth professionals who work with them.

Fathers-To-Be Handbook is a quick read and is a small-size paperback; like a “pocket guide.” It is definitely meant to accompany other reading and classes. It does not have an index, but does have a helpful resources section.

The first several chapters of the book are about the experience of fathering—about becoming a father, your personal history with your own father (“fathering school”—what was your teacher like?), the importance of fathers, and the journey through pregnancy. The final four chapters address preparing for birth, giving good support, empowered birth, and fathering the newborn. The handbook is very supportive of midwifery, homebirth, and doulas. It also encourages fathers to have a male support person nearby the birthing room (or perhaps available for support by phone).

As the author states in an article included at the end of the handbook, “Humanity cannot invent a drug that can work better than a mother’s body can manufacture or a knife that is sharper than her instinctual nature.” I deeply enjoyed an addition to birth literature that both honors the father’s experience and is rooted in a positive, healthy, celebratory approach towards birth and the inherent capabilities of a woman’s body.

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Disclosures: I received a complimentary copy of the book for review purposes.

Amazon affiliate link included in image and book title.

Review first published at Citizens for Midwifery.

DVD Review: Laboring Under an Illusion

Oct2

DVD Review: Laboring Under an Illusion: Mass Media Childbirth vs. The Real Thing
Filmmaker: Vicki Elson
50 minutes, $39.99 (personal use)
www.birth-media.com

Reviewed by Molly Remer, Talk Birth

Laboring under an Illusion is a treasure trove of discussion-provoking material. Filmmaker Vicki Elson is an anthropologist and childbirth educator who has created a striking documentary exploring media-generated myths about childbirth. As a childbirth educator, I often reference in my classes how our attitudes and expectations about birth are shaped by media messages—birth is an emergency, etc. This film eloquently and entertainingly provides 50 minutes of backup material for the idea!

The film blends media messages from comedy shows like Murphy Brown, Mad About You,and I Love Lucy, movie clips such as Juno, Coneheads, and Nine Months, along with “reality” based shows on Discovery Health with the inherently contrasting messages in clips of beautiful births from films like Birth as We Know It, The Business of Being Born, and Orgasmic Birth. It also contains brief voiceover narrations from “regular” women about birth. Occasionally, there is a scene with the filmmaker speaking directly to the viewer about concepts raised in the film. These scenes are less entertaining than the popular media clips and the friends with whom I watched the film wanted to fast-forward these segments—the media clips chosen so clearly speak for themselves that they don’t really need explanation, at least to the already birth-savvy viewer. Because of some strong language in the media clips, I caution parents to preview the film before sharing it with children.

Laboring Under an Illusion is an entertaining and illuminating film for consumers as well as for birth educators, doulas, and midwives. I highly recommend it!

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Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of the DVD for review purposes

Amazon affiliate link included in image.

DVD Review: The Big Stretch

Sep13

DVD Review: The Big Stretch

By Alieta Belle & Jenny Blyth

60 Minutes, includes 20 page booklet

www.birthwork.com

Reviewed by Molly Remer, Talk Birth

Jenny Blyth the author of the book Birthwork, is also a filmmaker who co-created the film The Big Stretch with another mother. The particularly special thing about this film is that it is all about women sharing their own experiences and feelings–unlike many current birth movies there are no “experts” present in the film (other than the true experts–women themselves!), the focus is on the families preparing for birth or reflecting on their past birth experiences. The many topics addressed are insightful.

The film’s emphasis is on, “Women in different stages of pregnancy and preparing for a natural birth reflect on how they and ‘stretched’ in everyway – emotionally, physically and spiritually” and I enjoyed this “stretch” theme that ran throughout.

Introducing new scenes/topic is neat artwork and the images in this film in general are particularly gorgeous. In one exception, I was taken aback by footage at the close of the film of a totally naked man riding a bicycle and feel I should warn other viewers to be prepared for that!

The DVD is accompanied by a 20 page booklet full of questions that carries the themes from the film into personal questions to increase self-awareness during pregnancy.

The Big Stretch is a unique and beautiful film in which women’s voices are clearly represented. There are no titles, no degrees, no qualifications listed. This film is a perceptive “motherful” look at the many stretches of birthing: physical, emotional, mental, and cultural.

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Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of the DVD for review purposes.

Review previously published at Citizens for Midwifery.

Children’s Book Review: We’re Having a Homebirth

Sep12

We’re Having a Homebirth

by Kelly Mochel

Softcover, Stapled, 16 pages

www.homebirthchildrensbook.com

Reviewed by Molly Remer, Talk Birth

We’re Having a Homebirth is a delightful new children’s book with a contemporary feel. The illustrations have a very modern, almost “manga” type appeal.

The book is a nice, positive, simple account of birth at home—it addresses each key issue children may be concerned with in very basic, friendly terms.

My boys, ages 6 and 3 at the time, cuddled up as I read it aloud and both enjoyed it very much. They especially liked the part about the placenta and cord-cutting.

The book is very colorful and half of the pages each have a different, eye-catching background color as well (the other half have white backgrounds).

I recommend this little gem to families planning homebirths and also for midwives to have available in their offices or lending libraries.

Small in size and fairly brief at 16 pages, We’re Having a Homebirth is reasonably priced at $6.50 or at only $2.99 for the Kindle version.

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Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of this book for review purposes.

Book Review: The Midwife of Hope River

Aug30

Book Review: The Midwife of Hope River: A Novel of an American Midwife
By Patricia Harman
Paperback: 400 pages
Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks; Original edition (August 28, 2012)
ISBN-13:978-0062198891

Reviewed by Molly Remer, Talk Birth

Already a fan of CNM Patsy Harman’s lyrical writing style and understated prose, I was eager to read her first foray into historical fiction. The Midwife of Hope River: A Novel of an American Midwife did not disappoint. This novel contains a little bit of everything: some mystery, some romance, some intrigue, some drama, some sociopolitical commentary and ecological activism, and also, birth. Lots of birth–some animal births and many human births. Some of the births are powerful, some are scary, some are sad, and all are realistic and touching.

The Midwife of Hope River is set in a small mining town in West Virginia during the Great Depression and follows the story of Patience Murphy, a midwife with some secrets, as she attends births in desperately poverty-stricken conditions. The story also explores the race relations of the time, with Patience developing a close and mutually supportive relationship with a young black woman who becomes her apprentice—a friendship that raises the hackles of the emerging KKK members in the region.

Harman’s writing reminds me of that of Catherine Cookson or Anne Tyler in the simple elegance with which she writes about normal people experiencing normal lives. Low key and plainspoken without unnecessary drama or angst, the result is a realistic story that speaks to the heart and to the common human experience.

I kept expecting something bad to happen in this book, and while there were definitely some bad events in the story, there was a wonderfully empowering scene towards the end, rather than the victimization or attack I was fearing. I simply can’t think of any type of historical fiction that could be better than a novel about a midwife!